Naples proved my theory wrong...

After lunch at Columbia Restaurant in Tampa, I headed south for Naples. On the way, I stopped at Ave Maria as a few people had mentioned they had a pretty church worth seeing (don't worry folks, this was weeks before the measles outbreak -- I'm just that far behind on the blog). While the church was pretty in an interesting modern style kind of way, the town of Ave Maria felt extremely artificial to me -- like someone decided to randomly pick a plot of undeveloped land then build a university and ritzy golf course communities centered around a European-esque town square with a big church in the middle. And as it turns out, that's almost exactly what happened. While the campus was beautiful, it had the same artificial feel as the town, but the Mother Theresa museum on campus was pretty cool.  

The big Church

Inside was more modern than I expected but still pretty in its own way

A little canal? Lake? River? Some body of water on campus

In Naples, I gave couch surfing another try. Previously, I'd had two successful couch surfing stays (Burlington, VT and Westerly, RI) but also a lot of non-responses. In Naples, my host was Rosie, an 88 year old woman originally from Minnesota. 

Rosie grew up in St. Paul, MN, but moved to Naples to be closer to her granddaughter who she often travels with. One of her favorite memories from growing up in St. Paul was the winter festival the city would throw at the end January each year. For the winter festival, the city would be divided up into 4 sections with a section for the wind of each cardinal direction (e.g. North Wind, East Wind, etc.). Local celebrities would serve as the King of the Winds and the princes of each wind. Each wind would also have a princess, with the queen of the carnival selected via a homecoming style pageant. There were also villains called Vulcans who would run around trying to smear tar on the princesses (all in good fun). The carnival would culminate in the defeat of the Vulcans by the King of the Winds, which meant winter would stay and spring was staved off (so the opposite of what the rest of America hopes for on Groundhog Day). While Rosie noted that Naples puts on many fun and elaborate festivals/parades throughout the year, none quite lives up to the winter carnivals of her memory in St. Paul. Rosie spent her career as a languages teacher, specializing in Spanish. Since retiring, she's taken up line dancing, gotten more involved with the Christian Women Connect Ministry at her church (she was working on organizing a fundraiser while I was there), and traveled the world. Some of her favorite trips have been Israel and the Camino in Spain. Later this year, she's looking forward to a mission trip to Cuba and a trip to Vietnam and Cambodia with a friend who was the French teacher at the school she used to work at. She says the secret to aging well is prayer and regular visits to the chiropractor. While Rosie, had other obligations during the day that prevented her from giving me the grand tour of Naples, in the evening we watched her favorite shows (911 and The Rookie) and enjoyed ice cream sandwiches together. 

My first evening in Naples, Rosie suggested I go to Blue Martini in the trendy Mercato neighborhood for dinner (she had already eaten by the time I arrived) and to meet other young people. While the Mercato was hopping and the live music at Blue Martini enjoyable, the only person under the age of 50 I met was the bartender, who appeared to be about my age. She had recently moved back to Naples after a number of years of working as a bartender at a famous Miami strip club in order to be closer to family and escape the craziness of Miami. She said Naples felt quite quiet and laidback compared to Miami. I asked for her Miami recommendations and she said I had to check out SPACE, a giant EDM night club famous for its late night raves that last well into the following morning. While I don't have the same stamina for late night partying that I did in college, I did consider hitting SPACE my first night in the Miami area (as it looked like cover might be cheaper than the pricey campsites in the area), but alas they didn't have a show/it was the rare night they weren't open. 

Glad I was on the motorcycle at the Mercato because I don't think I would have been able to find parking for a car

Felt like I had to get the Blue Martini at Blue Martini, and it was a steal at 50% off during happy hour. The bacon wrapped shrimp was good but not as heavily discounted. 

The following morning, I set off to hit the Naples highlights that Rosie had suggested I see, starting with a run on the Gordon River Greenway, a scenic network of trails and boardwalks through a riverfront nature preserve. After that I made my way to the beach, where my theory got put to the test...

The signs at the end of the avenues butting up against Naples Beach indicated that either a resident pass or payment was required for parking, but elsewhere in the country, I'd found that enforcement tends to be lax on motorcycles with tarps over them. I was just getting off my bike, when I noticed two plain clothes men who strangely seemed to be walking around inspecting license plates. Just in case they were undercover cops, I got ack on the bike, and rode to another beach entrance about 10 blocks away. I had been laying lazily on the beach for about 30 minutes when I noticed a guy checking out my bike a little too intently. I hustled over there to discover it was another plain clothes parking patrol officer and got there in the nick of time to talk him out of giving me a ticket. It was a great theory while it lasted; suffice to say my parking expenses have increased substantially since this experience. 

The Naples Pier got destroyed during a hurricane a few years back. While the city has almost entirely recovered, this was a clear visible scar that still remains. 

It was a chilly day on the beach - barely reaching a high of 60 - as the cold front hitting the rest of the nation began to crawl south into Florida. I took a quick plunge because I can't leave a beach without swimming, but I was surprised at how many locals still were sunbathing lightly clad in the cold wind. This appeared to e be a Naples specific phenomenon as I found other Florida beaches to be near Ghost towns during the cold snap. 

After using up every minute of parking I paid for at the beach, I made my way over to Paulita's a recently opened, highly reviewed taco joint. Not only were the tacos some of the best I've had, they were also quite affordable compared to every other restaurant I've been to in Florida ($10 for two tacos and chips with salsa). The chef/manager at Paulita's had recently moved over from another restaurant under the same ownership group after they discovered that he had previously worked at Chipotle. He was super stoked to hear I enjoyed the Tacos and spoke about how his previous experience with Mexican seasonings and food preparation helped make it an easier transition to the new role. It was really refreshing to see someone so excited aout their craft and so intent on delivering quality that surpassed customers' expectations. 

After Paulita's I wandered over to the famed 5th Avenue, home to Naples ritziest abodes, restaurants, retail, and art studios. While it was a bit too posh and upscale for my tastes, I could see how people would enjoy the atmosphere that had a sophisticated, northern Italian-inspired flavor to it. 

A cannolo (singular of cannoli) from Bonta' Bakery on 5th Ave. For my Cleveland audience, I'd say it tops Presti's but not Corbo’s.

The Porsche Experience on 5th Ave. I was too cheap to pay for a ride on the Porsche simulator. 

After that, it was off to Lowdermilk Park to catch sunset over the Gulf, where I had to again pay for parking. Quasi time lapse photos below. Y'all better enjoy these shots cause I just about blinded myself staring at the sun to get them.

The next morning, I made one final stop before leaving Naples. At my father's suggestion, I checked out Seed to Table, a grocery store he described as "absolutely fascinating". Those weren't words I'd ever heard let alone considered using to describe a grocery store, but I soon found that it was an accurate description. It's the sort of place you need to see to believe it exists. Imagine Whole Foods, but a whole lot more upscale and artisan vibes. Now add in the free samples of Costco, a loft with a full service restaurant, and a stage for live music. Top if off with plenty of overt right wing political propaganda. Below are some pictures to give you a taste:

Yes, you got that right, you're looking at Trump in a crown selling MAGA Beer. While I haven't been to may other grocery stores in Florida, this is the only place I've seen this brew sold. 

A section dedicated to My Pillow with a painting of the January 6th Insurrection.

The bathroom was sparkling clean, but every urinal had similar stickers. I don't know much about Chuck Schumer or what would make him creepy, but I must admit that the creativity of this one and the store's petty commitment to trolling their political opponents did make me chuckle a bit.

While Seed to Tale's overt political agenda is up for debate, the cold cut sandwich is not. I'm not normally a mortadella guy, but they may have converted me. 

You've never seen it all,

Paying-for-parking Kev